Ten Secrets

1 . I smile when I kiss. I can’t help it. If I’m not smiling, you’re in trouble. Or I’m incredibly turned on.

2. Sometimes, when I feel awkward or unhappy or both, I imagine I am a character in a book or a movie and then the awkwardness melts into charm and the unhappiness melts into glamour, and then I feel like I’m in control again.

3. Sometimes I make hypothetical, unrealistic sacrifices in my mind like, Universe, we both know I’m lonely, but if it’s a choice between me and her, send her someone to love first.

4.  I get very possessive of Audrey Hepburn (read: Holly Golightly) and I hate it when other people dress up as her!

5. I watch a lot of mindless shows. At the moment it’s Grey’s Anatomy which is smart and funny but ultimately fairly mindless. I do this because I can zone out. I haven’t been able to watch deep, thought-inducing movies/ shows for years. It makes me feel too much. And like I’m not doing enough.

6. I have hurt/ rejected more than my fair share of boys. It shames me but I think a small part of me is proud. To be so powerful, I suppose. Isn’t that awful?

7. I am ethical to the point of self-righteousness. I point this out because I have a rather naughty reputation. On Saturday I stole our shot glasses from the bar. I have shop-liften, tresspassed, mock-complained to cops on the street and danced on tables. However, despite all this, I have a severe moral compass. Which I wish I could smash every now and then. I feel so bound to duty that it can actually induce a bad mood. I think this is related to my my chronic politeness.

8. I spent most of my life biting my nails so, these days, if one break, YES, IT’S A TRAGEDY, OK?!

9. I lead a green life: I recycle, I don’t waste electricity, I’m a vegetarian… but I use a straw with every drink and I forget to wash them or I don’t feel like it and it makes me feel really guilty for wasting all that plastic. See Number 7.

10. Boys like me. They do. I know. They know. We know. I don’t know what my attitude is supposed to be towards this! Do I feign innocence, which is modest slash dishonest, or do I own it and risk coming across as incredibly arrogant? What say you, people?

And tell me one of your secrets!


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I drink, I laugh, I smoke, I write.

15 thoughts on “Ten Secrets”

  1. Well I’d guess it would be a good thing to see you smiling and not smiling than while kissing you.

    Make one of your sacrifices for me, Mother Theresa I don’t think the Universe listens to me.

    Tinkerbell fancies herself Holly Golightly and I as her “Fred” , I can’t argue the resemblance.

    Damn ethical compasses, oh to be a sociopath for just a little while.

    I wouldn’t feign innocence, modesty or act arrogant–I’d be weary.

    My secret: I am often a lucid dreamer, aware that I am dreaming but still apart of the dream. I can recall the dreams too if I make an effort to record m thoughts write away.

  2. I’m going to try out no 2! and about 5- I go through phases, but these usually last a couple of months. Grey’s Anatomy was too intense though (AND mindless at the same time), I kept bawling each time someone died :-/

    1. Man, they really overdo it, lah!
      (Do you ‘lah’ in Sri Lanka? My friend used to live in Malaysia and when she moved to Greece she infected us. Haven’t used it years!

  3. smile when you kiss – unbelievable. but will take you at your word. 🙂
    “a choice between me and her” – you and who?
    6 – i have a funny feeling there are others
    “chronic politeness” – that would be fun to test
    “Boys like me” – the online you, yes.
    secret – closet racist

  4. 10. Assume it. Skip it. Acting like it’s a given it’s the sexiest thing ever. One of the sexiest lines ever delivered to me was from a girl I met on a New Year’s Eve. I took her home. Nothing happened but there was a lot of attraction there. She called me the next day, chatted a little, then said, “So when are you coming over.” I didn’t know I was until she said that. I guess for the wrong guy it could make you vulnerable, but for the right guy it’s intriguing…

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